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May 2001
"if libraries were open as late as bars,
we'd be drunk on learning"

  • Republican senator defects.
    Vermont republican changed sides in the deadlocked US Senate to give democrats 50-49 edge. The treacherous senator will make it more difficult for old 5-4 Junior Bousch to deliver campaign promises of tax cuts and curtailed domestic programs. The establishment press which had been expected to clamour against the president's every move muted its criticisms of Bush and glee at his discomfort but instead streesd Bousch's 19 year old daughters nippings at Austin alehouses.
  • Holy Hillery: Hill out in front.
    The establishment press was asked by Sen Hill to stop drooling in her presence and swooning over her every move.
  • FBI Faux pas: FBI Bums Out.
    McVeigh Sentence delayed. FBI's failure to disclose reams of files cast doubt on McVeigh's conviction. McVeigh the supposed OK bomberstudies his next move. F [ull] [of] B [ull] [and lacking] I [nteligence]
  • Gracie Mansion Soap Opera
    NYC Mayor Rudolph Guilliani's new sweetheart won't become NYC's third first lady of the Guilliani administration. NYS Supreme Court Judge gave exclusive rights to Gracie Mansion to incumbant wife #2 and barred the insurgent candidate from gracing Gracie's genteel grounds.
Photo: Bubba Bill Cheering For Pres Hillery.

About the RPPS Society
The Rockaway Park Philosophical Society was founded in 1971 to exalt the mudane and ridicule the sublime. It abandoned greater intellectual pursuits to search for the greatest pizza pie in fullfilment of Rene Chateau Briand's challenge to philosophers to learn how to act in a dime sore.

It is the only such society sponsoring a school of national philosophy in which those of suitable philosophical types may BS and be BS-ed. It advocates American Standard Jive as the new national tounge.

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